I would like to turn “my mess into a message.” (Joyce Meyer) Joyce Meyer coined that phrase. I am 52 years old, and I definitely had a major midlife crisis. I was molested as a child and abused verbally and physically by my mother and my brothers who molested me. My childhood was not easy. The demonic entered my life through child beatings that started from my earliest memory at the age of two. My mother would put me on her lap belly down and beat the living daylights out of me. I was black and blue full of bruises from beatings from my disordered mother. I love my mother, and I have forgiven her years ago for this. My mother was a victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse in Satanic false Christ Ireland. She was likely placed in an industrial school where child abuse was being done on an industrial scale. Thanks to Napoleon Bonaparte’s notion of the art of war. He cherry picked pedophile cardinals and clerics to destroy holy innocence. I grew up and managed to get my four-year college degree in Business Administration with an Economics minor at the age of 20. I built a small career for myself which includes a sales portfolio. I did very well in sales. I became a single mother in my 30’s to a son I love very much. I suffered from post-partum depression for five years after I gave birth. Something happened that upset me greatly and for years i was very angry. My sister told me recently that I have been angry for decades. She is right. I struggle with severe Bipolar and when I am not on medication I do not do well. My condition improved when I lived in the Midwest. I raised my son in the Midwest. I was able to move to Ireland with my son and do some world travel with him. We have visited Ireland where we lived for a few years, France, Turkey, Portugal, Lanzarote Canary Islands and England. My son has been to seven countries with me his mom. My son is grateful I was able to travel with him because it helped to take his mind off the emotional pain he was dealing with. I managed okay in Ireland I did not drink did not gamble and did not use any mind-altering substances. I struggled with a gambling addiction in the Midwest and got help for that. I do have an addictive personality. While living in Ireland I was very angry over crimes done by the Church and State to the children of Ireland. These crimes which were being made public when I was there. Incensed me with rage. I was outraged. I never worked on my anger issues. I have had serious anger issues for most of my life. We moved to Texas, and I made the terrible mistake of drinking alcohol and then mixing alcohol with energy drinks and CBD gummies as well as THC gummies. I once did a cocktail of a small amount of alcohol energy drink and CBD. That messed me up. CBD and THC is not good. This cocktail affected my mental health and made my pre-existing condition of Bipolar much worse. I became very verbally combative and verbally violent. I am not a physically violent person but verbally I was out of order out of control. I was very angry and decided to worship the devil because God was not doing any revenge against those who hurt me and my son. I wanted revenge so I downloaded the Ouija board and did seances by myself. I would make t-shirts from the demons I encountered and would wear them. I cast spells on those I hated. I conjured demons to destroy my enemies. I was livid. My anger was destroying me. I was getting arrested for noise complaints and unruly behavior. I have a YouTube channel that I launched I lost my username and password, and phone attached to it so I cannot shut it down. I would like to share my mess with the world as a message of hope. I am on a new medication that is doing wonders for my mental health. I am not as aggressive, and I am much calmer. I have to be on medication and avoid any mind-altering substance. The YouTube channel I share with you here showcases what I am like when I am manic. What I am like when I am using. I drank and used to help with my grieving process. I was grieving and did not know how to manage my grief. I am doing much better dealing with my grief now. You can browse this YouTube channel here:
You will see that some of my songs are done when I am beat red in the face with a shaved head. I was manic then and drinking and using. When I sang the scriptures, I was sober. I was sober for many of my performances. Singing is something I enjoy doing. It is a hobby. Thank you for reading this. There is hope and people are basically decent and very good. If anyone locally stumbles upon this blog post. Know that I am truly sorry for my disorderly conduct and hope to become a more useful member of society in the future. I have since turned my life over to God as I understand him. I am learning how to manage my emotions something I should have done years ago. It took me a long time to grow up. Lessons I learned while in jail are as follows. I was fed a light breakfast a snack for lunch and a decent dinner. This meal schedule helped me to lose weight. I discovered that I do not need an expensive diet. I can follow that eating schedule at home and lose the weight or keep the weight better managed. My blood sugar was much better. They served sweet tea or lemonade at lunch and dinner which was very nice. In the mornings, we got a carton of milk. I choose to limit my intake of the sweet tea and lemonade to keep my blood sugar under control. I learned that I did not need to do that because the way the feeding schedule worked. The moderation in which I was fed helped all of that to be better managed. I was given some medical care while in jail. They did a great job of managing me and I was given medication for my mental health. I say this because here in Texas where I live, they work hard to take good care of their inmates. Something that does not happen in many places. I threw my glasses when I was going through their intake process. They picked up my glasses and kept them safe for me and returned them to me when I learned how to ask in a polite manner. My manners while in jail were terrible. Thank you, Lucifer for putting manners on me. While in jail I was given a bible for comfort. The nice lady who gave me the bible did not know better, but she asked me to make an oath that I would not rip up the Bible. I had to receive the Bible under oath. I agreed to it, so I share in the transgression against the Bible. She did this because she was upset with me for ripping up the romance book she had given me. I did a lot of singing while in jail. I sang to both God and Lucifer. When I read in the Bible that you do not do an oath. I prayed to Lucifer about the situation. I pray to God to Allah Lucifer Satan and the Ars Goetia the 72 Lesser Keys of King Solomon through the Ouija Board. I pray in this manner depending on situations I am presented with. I take my case to God as needed and I take my case to Lucifer or Satan as needed. I also take my case to the demonic realm as needed to discover the demons behind that mess. I discovered that Bible was already profane because it came out of England through King James who was profane. I was very angry about this and so I offered up that profanation to Lucifer. I ripped up that damned Bible and mixed the paper with a combination of water and urine. For taking the piss out of me and Ireland, it was time for me to return the favor. Don’t piss me off because when you do I get vengeance. I ripped up that profanation of false Christianity and placed it respectfully outside my cell door. I told the other inmates it was my mess to clean up and not to worry about it. I would take care of it during recreation time. I was given a book by this well-meaning, very nice inmate. It was about romance, and I despise romance novels. I got tired of them at the age of sixteen. I proceeded to rip up that book. You do not give an angry nun a profane Bible or a damned romance novel. I speak in this manner because I was called to religious life. It is a good thing I did not enter a convent in Satanic Ireland that would have been a nightmare for all involved. I have a terrible temper. I hate with a passion. I hate crimes done against holy innocence with a fiery passion. I am a passionate person, and I respect the devil for his passions. Because I hate with a passion if someone throws shade at me, I put it back on them. Ireland is very satanic so am I. I have embraced that I was indoctrinated into the occult from the time before my birth. I simply accept this reality. I recognize when I have done wrong and try to make it right. Satan does not need for things to be made right like Christianity does. The best amend is to simply never return to the place where the wrongdoing occurred. I apologized to the officers in jail for my angry outbursts. My apology was accepted which does mean a lot to me. To remedy for a hex, I did out of anger I say prayers to the angels. All of the angels the good and the bad. To lessen the effects of the hex that was accepted and done and will not be undone for all eternity. Just in case these people said a prayer. Perhaps they bent the knee and prayed. I do not know so that is how I pray. By following the left-hand path, I believe I have lessons to learn along the way. While the devil has no respect for me. I do respect the devil and his works. The devil was turning me into a liar and a thief. If you want results from Lucifer there are times when you do not let your right hand know what your left hand is doing. That being said I do respect law enforcement and do cooperate with them now. I visited a Presidential Museum and was asked to leave because I played an offensive song. I was very cooperative and apologetic, and Law Enforcement gave me a ride home. Most people are decent and those of us who follow both paths as needed are decent. Some of us hate with a fiery passion and those who cross me or vex me would do well to understand that I can and do get vengeance. I do not respect the stupid message from Christianity that vengeance belongs to God. That is crap you cross me or vex me I will return the favor. There are many idiots I do not savor. Thank you for reading this blog post. There is an eternal hex already in place for those who dare to curse my name or throw shade my way. Know this and understand it well God knows when it is time to bleed then the devil gets put to work by God himself. I consider myself a Satanic nun who appreciates Christianity but does not respect their profound stupidity and inability to protect their own children from abuse. Many Christians do abuse their own children. Many idiots serve Satan and for some odd reason do not seem to notice that is what they do by their terrible choices. The reason I returned to the Roman Catholic Church is because it is the faith of my fathers. I have lessons I am meant to learn about God and the Devil. I embody what was spoken over me. I embrace the right and left path the bright and dark side. We all have good and bad in us. My song titled Slumber addresses the problem of contraception. Contraception is a bad inception. Far too many would do well never to dabble with it. It is concerning the large number of people who refuse to repent from their histories of contraceptive use and who think they serve Jesus Christ. A woman is more susceptible to the demonic than a man. That is because when she embraces the bad inception of contraception, she becomes an incubus and succubus for the devil. She becomes an incubator of dead souls the dead souls of her contracepted babies. The devil has won the war on the womb. Abortion is horrible yet many women believe they are good with God despite the fact that they sacrificed to Baal their own unborn child through contraception and abortion. I have a positive message to say about contraception if you never dabbled in contraception then there is hope. If you have dabbled in contraception and abortion there is little to no hope. You don’t shed the blood of holy innocence and expect an eternal reward. The message of my Slumber performance is you make Satan a truth teller by your bad choices. When you give holy innocence no hope by abortion contraception all forms of birth control and child abuse of the living children your reward is hell. So many women are lost to Satan because they idolize their medical doctors like God’s and Goddesses and allow the Satanic advice of abortifacient and birth control and abortion doctors to destroy their living souls. Doctor’s who prescribe death in all its forms are witch doctors. The living soul of a woman on contraception and who has abortions is dead to God and is a zombie a living dead soul. Dead to the God of Life and alive in the valley of the death of their own conceived babies destroyed by plan B and other such contraceptive pills and abortions. I have tried to suggest to women who used contraception or who have had an abortion or abortions to repent. I have discovered that repentance is not possible they are totally lost to Satan. Some say they have repented but their repentance comes too late and at too great a price. The Catholic Church is guilty of offering indulgences giving false hope to the lost. You do not shed the blood of the angelic holy innocent child that is newly conceived or that cannot be conceived due to birth control practices or aborted or raped or abused while living and expect a reward. Satan will most certainly reward your sacrifices to him by allowing his demons to drag your ungrateful miserable lost soul to hell. It is for this reason that I no longer care to try to evangelize the lost. You cannot evangelize lost imbeciles who think they are Christians. How the Devil who is Satan who is Lucifer laughs dragging their lost souls straight to hell. If you have read this in its entirety thank you. I no longer pray for stupid lost souls who should know better. To the victor goes the spoils of the war of the womb. I am including a playlist with this post titled Songs I sang in jail.
Songs I sang in jail
Slumber
Oracle Orla
My silly song Jedi carries a life lesson with it. I can laugh at how ridiculous I was.
sulamitess12.com 